In light of trying to be my authentic self I have an admission to make.  Blogging is hard for me.  There I said it.  It’s not that I don’t have things to blog about.  For anyone who has ever met me you know that I have a LOT to say.  Sometimes too much to say.  Why can’t I blog more often?  The answer is: I don’t know.  I don’t know why I put off blogging.  It’s a hassle to resize the photos and think of something important to say.  Seriously, what could I write that will hold your attention?  Maybe it’s a fear of putting my thoughts out there for eternity.  Once it’s online it will never go away. right?

One of my goals for 2010 is to blog more often and I tell you it has been a struggle.  I lay awake at night trying to think of something to share that will be worth your time to stop by and read……still having trouble with that sometimes.

Today, though, I have something to share.  Someone to share about.  Someone inspiring!

Last week I was blessed to be able to attend the One Light Workshop in Atlanta, Georgia.   Let’s just say that I did not have the best grasp on lighting techniques.  Yes, I have been using off camera flash, but it was always a hit or miss situation.  I understood it about like I understand Geometry.  I passed Geometry in high school (barely), but I had no idea what I was doing.  Still not sure how I got through that class.  Anyway, I knew enough about lighting to be dangerous, but not enough to really know what I was doing.  One of my other goals for 2010 was to attend some workshops and this one was at the TOP of my list.  The photographer behind the One Light Workshop is Zack Arias and he is an amazing and inspiring person. If you have a moment you should check out his Transform video.  It is truly inspiring.  Perhaps my favorite part of the whole workshop was the mixer the night before where Zack shared how he got to where he is today.  He shared his story of struggle, disappointment and debt.  Then he shared his story of a friend who believed in him and how he learned to believe in himself and how he built his now very successful business ALL OVER AGAIN without debt.  He and his lovely wife were a joy to be around.  I’m blessed to have met them and their adorable son.

So did I actually learn anything?  Absolutely!  Zack began to explain lighting step by step and almost immediately the light bulb (no pun intended) lit for me.  It is so simple.  I just got it….finally!  I am so excited to now be armed with this knowledge and am excited that I will have more options available to me for client sessions.  It is amazing what a little light will do.  Just check out my photos from the workshop:

First, I want to show you these images that are both straight out of the camera with just resizing and a bit of sharpening.  The one on the left is available, natural light.  The one on the right is one flash, with a 60″ umbrella off camera.

The following images are taken with the same light setup and have had a bit of editing done to them using the TRA Lightroom Presets.

My favorite image of the day below:

One of the big things I have struggled with over the past year is taking personal photos.  I started my business because taking pictures (especially of my family) is was what makes my heart sing.  Somewhere along the way it became work.  Getting the camera out to document my own life became a hassle.  Not to mention the trouble of downloading and editing and then blogging the photos.  AHHHH.  Makes me tired to just think about ALL that work for a photo of my daughter.  I mean, she’s standing right here.  I can look at her.  Then I remembered that there are those whose love her that are not so lucky as I.  They don’t get to see Mia everyday.  It’s definitely not everyday that is snows as much as it did today in Texas!  The main thing that got me bundled up and moving this morning was the thought that NOW is the time to record this.  NOW is the time to tell Mia’s story of a snow day.  She will NEVER again be 5 years old on February 11, 2010 with a sparkle in her eyes because it’s snowing.  Time is fleeting and I was suddenly panicked that I might miss it.

I made the time, and my heart sang.

It’s been 3 weeks since I attended the Making Things Happen intensive and boy has it been busy around here. The main thing we have been discussing and working on is the process of rebranding our business.
You may wonder WHAT is rebranding exactly well………

Rebranding is the process by which a product or service developed with one brand, company or product line affiliation is marketed or distributed with a different identity. This may involve radical changes to the brand’s logo, brand name, image, marketing strategy, and advertising themes. —-from Wikipedia.

As many of you know my husband, Saylor, has become more involved in Cindy Mills Photography since I began shooting weddings. He is my assistant, second shooter and all around shoulder to lean on.  He keeps me from completely FREAKING out when things get a little rushed.  He runs to the car multiple times through out the day to get things we left and he carries all the heavy stuff.  I couldn’t do it without him…and I don’t want to.  We love shooting weddings together.  It’s fun.  Almost like a little date for us.  We get to hang out all day and sometimes even share a piece of wedding cake.  During the ceremony I almost always get teary eyed during the vows, because I am always reminded of our wedding day.  I am always moved to reflect for a few minutes on the last 7 (almost 8 ) years and how wonderful they have been and how QUICKLY they have flown by.  I am truly blessed.  Anyway, back to the topic at hand.  Since Saylor has unofficially been a part of the business for almost a year we have decided to make him an OFFICIAL part.  With this comes some changes.  We feel like we are no longer “Cindy Mills Photography”, but we are a husband and wife team.  Thus, begins the process of rebranding or as I like to call it “finding ourselves”  How do we want to represent this business to our clients and the community?

In the past 3 weeks we have talked, and talked and talked some more about who we are and what we like and we have learned a ton.  So, keep coming back to the blog for updates on this crazy journey.  We are very excited about where we are going and ready for a fresh, exciting new adventure!  Prayers for us would also be greatly appreciated as we make the transition.  We love our clients and we want to be the VERY best we can be for you all.  Thanks for your constant support.

We are extremely proud to announce that Cindy Mills Photography has been rated by local brides and voted The Knot Best of Weddings 2010 Pick!!!!

Wow. Not really sure where to start.  I know that I’ve have a lot of emails from facebook friends recently wanting to know what foreign language I’m speaking and (the most frequent question) “What is #MTH2010″.  Well, the best that I can explain to them is my life has changed.  In one day.  BAM!  Just like that.  Well, not exactly, BAM,  it has been more like a slow change that has been happening for awhile I just finally had my eyes opened last Thursday.

Last Thursday….wait…..let me start further back.  A few months ago I realized that my life had gotten pretty hectic and I was at a point where I couldn’t figure out how to do it all and be happy at the same time.  I was on a one way road to Freakoutville (it’s a real place).  I was overwhelmed and couldn’t get my act together.  I wanted a change, I wanted to be positive again and I wasn’t sure how to get that back.  When I’m overwhelmed, I avoid.  So, as fate (or I like to think God) would have it I was avoiding by reading blogs on the internet.  I came across a blog I had NEVER been to before written by Lara Casey, editor of Southern Weddings Magazine.  I began reading about a workshop that she was launching in less than a week and the first stop was Dallas.  Sounded interesting, but I surfed on to other sites.  I kept coming back though.  There were a nagging in my head that made me need to know more.  So I ventured to Emily Ley’s blog and watched her video blog about her experience at the very first intensive.  That’s when it felt like I had to do ANYTHING possible to get there.  This was something that I NEEDED to be at.  For my sanity.  So long story short I was able to attend on Thursday.

To describe what happened in my head as I participated in this intensive is impossible.  All I know is I could see the twisted, mangled, confusing path that lay before me begin to untangle and straighten out.  All of a sudden I wasn’t so overwhelmed anymore.  I was fired up and EXCITED for the future.  When I arrived on Thursday morning I was mentally a mess.  I couldn’t even introduce myself before the tears started.  I was scared to share my failures with strangers.   But, as I learned at the intensive…..I felt the fear and did it anyway…..and I felt better.  Like a weight had been lifted.  In the course of an afternoon I was able to work through some of that mental mess and get some clarity on where I am going in 2010.

So, where am I going?  What am I doing?  Well, I have 3 major things that I’m going to make happen this year:

1.  I will be my authentic self–When I branded my business I put together something that I thought would convey that I take fun, unique photos.  While, I do take fun, unique photos and like to have a good time during photo sessions I wasn’t exactly true to myself.  I didn’t brand my business based on WHO I AM.  I branded it based on WHO I THOUGHT YOU WANTED ME TO BE.  So, in light of being my authentic self (and also since Saylor will be joining the business) we will be working on re-branding in 2010.  This is a BIG, HUGE undertaking and will take awhile so……please be patient as we find ourselves.

2.  I will do things that make me uncomfortable–maybe that should say that I’m going to do things that are out of my comfort zone.  This means trying new things and learning new things.  Last week I attended a dance class that my friend Corinne teaches.  She has been trying to get me to go for over a year.  I finally decided I would feel the fear and do it anyway.  It was a blast.  Can’t wait to go again.  I also met some really awesome new people.  I plan to do more of this in 2010!

3.  I will surround myself with people that contribute to my creativity–I met a wonderful group of people at MTH2010 in Dallas and can’t wait to get to know them all better.  I think being around people that have similar goals as I do and are incredibly positive and encouraging is the best way to get where you want to go.  I’m looking forward to developing these friendships!

So there you have it.  How I’m changing my life.  I’ve never thought that writing was one of my strengths, but this post just poured out of me.  I’m fired up about making things happen.  I’m a little nervous about putting these thoughts out for the whole world to read, and I’m definitely feeling the fear, but you know what? I’m going to do it anyway!

I’ve been obsessing over a few things recently.  I thought it would be fun to share some items that I just can’t seem to get enough of!

New Year.  Ahhh.  NEW year.  There is something about beginnings that make me feel relieved.  It’s like a do-over.  You get to start over.  Wipe the slate clean.  Fresh. NEW year.  A whole NEW year to get it right this time.

I’ve never really liked new year’s resolutions.  There is something about making a goal into a “resolution” that instantly sets me up for failure.  As if the very act of calling it a “resolution”  makes it into something I’m going to quit doing within a few days or weeks.  So I have never really been into making new year’s resolutions.  This year, though, is going to be different (sort of).

2009 was a rough year for me.  I started it off like many others with a vow to lose weight, by eating right and exercising.  One of those things that usually only lasts about a month.  This time it worked.  Actually, what happened is that I finally embraced the idea that I was just going to have to workout harder than other people to finally lose it.  I started slowly, but I made working out part of my “job.”  If it was a weekday I HAD to go to the gym.  Like it was part of my job description.  There were a few days where I missed.  There were MANY days I wanted to quit, but then all that work would have been for nothing, so I kept going…….  Then a funny thing happened.  It became part of my life.  Going to the gym was just something I did.  Finally, for the first time in my life I actually LIKED working out.  I know what you are thinking “This is good. How could this make 2009 a rough year?”  Well, I tend to put a lot of pressure on myself.  That’s the pitfalls of being a people pleaser.  I was finally doing something for myself, but I couldn’t tell others NO.  I was still trying to be supermom and super photographer and superwoman.  By the end of the year I was drained, angry and about ready to have a nervous breakdown.  So I decided that I would take a vacation, Christmas vacation, just like everyone else.  Sure I had work to be done, but I ignored it.  I tried to also ignore those nights that I woke up in a cold sweat thinking “my clients are going to be upset that I’m taking a vacation and not working on their photos.”  See, told ya, people pleaser.  Anyway, you know what I realized?  It was the best thing I could have done for myself, my family AND my business.

So for the first year in a long time I made some resolutions, although I’m going to call them goals so I’ll actually stick to them. :)  One of the things on this list is to do what I loved most when I started my business: Blogging!  Blogging used to be a guilty pleasure and now it’s a task on a long list of things-to-do and it usually gets lost in the shuffle.  So, I’m going to be blogging. Alot.  Sessions and boring, mundane things about our life and my daughter (after all, she is the reason I started blogging to begin with).   Another major thing I’m going to be doing this year is WORKSHOPS!  I want to learn more.  I crave some hands-on knowledge that I can’t learn on my own so I’m going to be going to some photography workshops this year.  SO excited.  I’ll be sharing my adventures, successes and failures with you all!  The main goal I have for myself is to balance work, family and self better.  I’m going to have to learn to say “NO” to things that I can’t fit into this balance.

So, I’m excited about this renewal.  This do-over. This NEW YEAR that I have to enjoy life.

Thanks to all the friends, family and clients that have been so supportive and have allowed me to put myself out there!  I love you all.

Since a post is always better with a photo here is me and my family at the end of 2008 and again at the end of 2009.  Always, fun to compare where you are a year apart.  Strangely, my Christmas tree looks exactly the same. :)  Happy 2010 everyone!

It’s not often that I’m speechless, but these photos certainly leave me that way. I was beyond honored to photograph the wedding of a dear friend last Saturday.  It made me happy to watch her prepare for the big moment and I even got a little teary- eyed during the ceremony.  I just love these two and I wish them all the happiness that life can bring!  Congratulations Holly and Patrick.

Now on to the photos!

Some of my favorite repeat clients met with me at the Dallas Arboretum last Sunday.  Apparently ALL of DFW also got the invitation, because is was CROWD-ED!  With a little patience and a sense of humor we ended up having a really great time.  It was a such a beautiful day and the light at the end of the day was absolutely amazing.

Here are my favorites from our afternoon at the Arboretum.

As I get older I have realized that there will always be that handful of friends who drift into and out of my life, but they are always there.  Those friends that I can call up after it’s been a few years and it’s like we never skipped a beat.  It’s like the last conversation we had just picks up where it left off.  There is never an uncomforable “getting to know you again” time period.  We are always just comfortable and ourselves.  Holly is one of those friends.

Holly and I met 10 years ago.  Where did the time go?  We were both teaching at the same school.  Both stuck back in the furthest, darkest, most remote area of the building where they hide the (cue the scary music) ELECTIVES!   One thing developed back in that corner of the building and it was a small group of close knit friends.  I’m not talking about the students….I’m talking about the art/language department clique.  Those wonderful people helped me survive a job that I WANTED to love, but desperately hated.  Holly was one of those special people.

Holly is one of the most vibrant, positive and just plain FUN people that I have ever been around.  I am absolutely honored that she and Patrick chose me to be their wedding photographer and I couldn’t be MORE happy to see how in love they are.  I’ve only just met Patrick so I don’t have as many nice things to say about him yet, but if he can make my friend smile the way that she does then I know he is wonderful!

Congratulations to you both!  Can’t wait until December 12th!  I still can’t believe how lucky I am to get to photograph your important day.  Thanks!

Holly and Patrick had their first date at this particular Starbucks and it was a great location to start their session.

Then we headed out to The Harbor in Rockwall.  It was a beautiful location and absolutely felt like we had left the Dallas area.  Nantucket anyone??

The next one is my FAVORITE!!!